Rhythmism.com

craig's list funneh

http://newyork.craigslist.org/about/.../23492910.html

Alberto, fix your contact info, and call a lawyer
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Reply to: anon-23492910@craigslist.org
Date: Sat Jan 31 10:58:21 2004

I feel like I know you buddy, my dirtbag friend with problems, but we've never met. I got a new phone number, and your people keep leaving messages on my answering machine. The first was from your boss, asking why you weren't at work. Those continued for a few days. The messages changed from annoying to entertaining as your boss called and alternated pissed-off/threatening with pleading/begging you to come back to work.

Over the next week I started to look forward to coming home and seeing how your life was playing out on my machine. You must have had a really crappy job no one else wanted, because those calls continued for a week and a half.

Some pissed off spanish speaking woman called when I was home for once, and I told her you didn't live there. I speak little spanish, but I understand angry woman in any language, so you should probably smooth things over with your girlfriend.

A law office has called the last two days, regarding some lawsuit. I left messages saying they have the wrong number, but they keep calling anyways.

Dude, Alberto, your getting fired, dumped, and sued. I am waiting for messages from the police, but I have been praying for you Alberto. If it makes you feel any better, I enjoyed the drama on my machine.

hahahahaha

another one! !!!

one free fish. (warning - he is a wanker.)
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Reply to: anon-23205093@craigslist.org
Date: Mon Jan 26 23:00:25 2004

it's FREE! you heard me. you come get 'im and he is yours.

I have a bunch of tetras in a tank. They are all very small. The guy at Nippon Goldfish sold me two MALE guppies. One is very cool, but the other one is a total ass. He comes out from behind the plants all "WHASUP! I AM THE BIGGEST FISH IN THIS MUTHA! THIS MY TERRITORY! CHECK YOSELF!" and goes nipping after the other fish's lil fins.

People, I am afraid for my other fish. I am vegetarian so I can't bring myself to just flush his bully ass. I am confident if he had a bigger tank with bigger fish he would be just fine - the guy at the pet store told me these fish are "peaceable community dwellers". Cept' for this hood rat and my neons.

He's so small - just about an inch long, a pretty orange with a flowy tail, he is what is termed a "fancy guppy", but there is just not enough room in that town for both of them. He should do well in a tank with females, or with bigger fish.

he is FREE FREE FREE if
1. you are a good person (not doing experiments on him or somethin)
2. you can come get him
3. you think your fish can take his scrappy self on.

Right now, he is under an upside down pint glass in the tank but time-outs don't seem to teach him a lesson. SO! I invite you to stop by our house Tuesday afternoon at Haight and Webster, come get this dickhead out of our lives.

@ the wanker fish post. AWESOME.

I know right? especially when you read that the fish is 1 inch long and has a frilly tail.

I had a wanker fish once but was not so kind as the craigslist guy. I was really mad about his attacks on poor Tony, Tiny, and Tina...totally uncool. I put him in a bowl of water on the kitchen floor so that my thrill-deprived cats could hunt and eat him. But then they were scared of his violent thrashing and badass 'tude (my cats are such pussies!) so after a while I just flushed him.

Yo....that is so damn funny!!!! I am sitting here laughing my ass off right now at this!!!

My parents and I used to have a huge goldfish tank-and one day my parents thought it would be cool to get an african frog to throw in there. Well, at first 'Gilbert' was cool....but then he got bigger and very aggressive....started attacking the fish in the tank. He successfully managed to remove the eyes of the 2 calico moores we had-and one eye from the black moore....luckily, the fish didnt die-they actually lived for 7 years....blind!
We eventually had to take the frog back to the petstore because he had no business being in the tank with other fish....bastard!

This thread is hilarious, esp the wanker fish

Initially I thought thoughtintruder was in trouble